No Matter What

So this isn't quite the post that I imagined would be one of the first. But I have a heavy heart tonight so I guess I want to get some thoughts out.  Stacey and I just went and saw the movie "Definitely, Maybe."  For sure a really cute movie. And not just because of Ryan Reynolds. Well, mostly because of him, but other reasons too. (Don't worry, I've admitted my crush to Donnie and he's okay with it)  He's a dad in the middle of a divorce and is telling his young daughter about how he and her mother met.  You follow the love story and you want everyone to live happily ever after. But you wonder, is it possible? She wants her parents to be in love but wants her parents to be happy and so if they aren't happy in love, then what do you do?  And why is she even having to think about these things?  She's a kid. 

Only I could take a chick flick and turn it into an outlet to pour all of my feelings. 

I hear people say "everything happens for a reason" and I sort of feel like its used as a cop out sometimes. Or a way to explain away something that's otherwise too difficult to explain.  My parents divorced when I was young. If it hadn't have happened, neither would the whole chain of life events that led me to where I am. With Donnie and Reagan and Kiefer. But that doesn't mean it was okay for them to divorce or make it right what happened or that it all "happened for a reason."  The reason was, they didn't think what they had was worth it, I guess? Okay, I digress. 

Our church held a marriage event last week and the speaker had us start by listing marriages of real life people that we know who have a good marriage. A relationship to admire and learn from.  Needless to say, our list was short. (Even counting 2nd and 3rd marriages) And so was everyone else's. Why is that? Why is it so difficult for people to make a commitment and stay with that commitment? And why is it that the children are the ones to pay for it?

The description of this blog is "forever and always no matter what." That's a tall order to live up to. But that's a commitment that Donnie and I have made. To each other and to our children. No matter what. And that doesn't mean that we are better than anyone else or judging anyone else. I guess its just a priority that we insist on keeping first. I hope that when Reagan and Kiefer are adults they can look back and see that we worked hard to make our family work. That we put God first and relied on Him to help us through the hard times.  That we worked together as a family. As a Team.

I promise some more light-hearted thoughts to come soon. 

And probably some pictures of the cutest boys in the world.  Speaking of them, I'm going to go smile on their peaceful, sleeping faces and try to get some shut-eye myself.