Chips, really tall kids, and other nonsense

I'm big on customer service. It makes me happy to receive good customer service. Which honestly, should be par for the course, not the unusual event it seems to be. Bad customer service irritates me every time. No eye contact. No "hello." Or somehow making me feel like I'm imposing on you by making you work.  But sometimes there's service that's not bad nor good. Just crazy.  For example, here's part of the conversation with "Adrian" today in the Sam's checkout line. And just imagine her talking v.e.r.y  s.l.o.w.l.y, sort of like Matthew McConaughey for my "Dazed and Confused" fans.... 

Adrian: Oh, your boys are so cute. They sort of look like twins. (they're dressed the same today)

Me: Thanks. They are twins. 

A: How.. old... are... they? (seriously. that's how it was)

Me: almost 2

A: Oh, I have a two year old nephew. But he is really tall. Like up to here. (She proceeds to walk around the register, turns around, and points to the bottom of her bum, indicating how tall he is) But his dad is freakishly tall, like 6 foot. So like, I'm not surprised. 

A: Oh, do you guys like grapes? (as she's putting them in the cart)   What are their names?

Me: Reagan and Kiefer

A: (looking at Reagan) Hi. Are you Reagan? Your mom said your names are Reagan and Kiefer but she didn't tell me which one you are. 

Reagan: blank stare

Me: That's Reagan

A: Hi Reagan 

Me: (Okay, she's sweet. But she probably shouldn't stop ringing up my items to talk to my kids when there are people in line) 

A: HI REAGAN!  

Reagan: Blank stare (and this is, mind you, after saying "hi" and "bye" to at least 6 other people in the store)

A: He must be shy.  (turning to Kiefer)  HI KIEFER!

Kiefer: Blank stare  

A: I have a friend named Kiefer.

Me: Oh really? 

A: Yeah. His name is Kiefer Sutherland.   (no joke. she said it) 

She then proceeds to put 2 bags of chips directly behind Kiefer, where he grabs them, and I take them away and place them elsewhere in the cart.  

A: Oh you must like chips. Don't put the chips by Kiefer. Kiefer likes chips.  (long pause) Sometimes I talk to myself. Sometimes I talk to myself, but I always say it's okay to talk to yourself as long as you don't answer yourself.  (another long pause)  Sometimes I answer myself. 

She hands me my receipt and wishes me a good day.  

(What's a post without a picture?.... No picture from Sam's today, but here's a picture of the boys in the same kind of double cart at Costco around New Year's.  This is how it goes at Sam's, too. )